I Got A New Blog!!!

Hey all!

I decided to start all over with a new blog! You know the great thing about it? I'm going to be posting way more on it! So please go check it out and follow it! 

Thank you! :) 
Sydney

Go to new blog >>>

To The Friends I've Lost Along The Way...

You guys know who you are. You used to be someone of my best friends. We shared a lot of laughs, spoke in undertones at times, (I) shed some tears in front of you guys, and talked about anything and everything.

But now there's nothing. No conversations beyond occasional friendly small talk because we have to exchange some sort of information. Did I ever dream it would turn out like this? No. Did I want it like this? Heck no! 

Sometimes I think about and miss you guys. On one hand, I want to let go of these friendships, but I can't seem to. It hurts. On the other, I want to solve the problems. I've tried, but it doesn't really work either.

So this is me saying that I'm sorry. I apologize if I did anything to end our friendships. I know it's probably not either of our faults, but that life just sometimes takes people in different directions. I understand that, but I will admit that sometimes I do miss the old days.

Therefore, this is me either saying goodbye or proposing a start-over.

If this is goodbye, I want you to know that I loved each of you. I want nothing but the best for y'all in life. Thank you for the good memories and amazing moments we shared. It was a wild ride. 

If this isn't goodbye, just know that I'm always a text or a phone call away. I'm always here. 

Love,
Sydney

An Open Letter To My Closest Friends...

This is an open letter to the wonderful people in my life that I'm close to. You all know who you are. I didn't really edit this much...I just kind of kept it rough and from the heart.

So without further ado...

Dear Close Friends,

To the girl who has been there since like the beginning of my life. You keep me accountable, love me no matter what, and listen to me ramble on and on. We have so many great memories together. You challenge me to be a better Christian and are a good example of what a God-centered life looks like. I'm sorry for the times I'm not always the kindest to you...I do know that we don't agree on everything, and I really should respect that more. :) I missed you this past summer when you were gone at camp, etc. You're truly like my big sister and are one of my very best friends. I love you!

To the girl who adopted me as her little sister years ago...and have grown super close to these past couple years. You'll have me over for sleepovers at your house or just the two of us will be hanging out somewhere by ourselves and we will talk about anything and everything...you definitely challenge me in my faith and yet I don't really feel like you judge me that much. We agree on a lot of things that I never thought we would to be honest. :P I love you--you're my older sister and one of my very best friends!

To the girl I consider my best friend...thank you for coping with my craziness and joining in with me. Thank you for accepting and loving me for who I am, but even more so, enjoying being around me when I'm being my ridiculous self. Thank you for the times you just listened to me talk non-stop about something stupid when you wanted to go to sleep early. I love you, my adopted little sister.

To the boy who's like my (slightly) younger brother. Yeah, I've known you your whole life. There are pictures of me holding you as a baby. We have a lot of the same personality and our opinions clash often, but I know you love me unconditionally and I do the same. Thank you for always being there. I missed you this fall when you went a way and stayed with friends for a couple months.

To my guy bestie...thank you for putting up with me being an idiot sometimes. I know I can be crazy...even though most of the time it's not in person, and I appreciate that you'll respond to my messages no matter what. I take you for granted way too much of the time. You're hilarious and talented and I'm truly blessed to have you as a best friend. You mean a lot to me.

To another one of my best friends who lives way too far away from me. You fill a void in my heart that no one else does. It was a very unlikely friendship, but I have no clue where I would be without you. We've had our moments and disagreements, but you're always there to listen (and I want to let you know that I'm here always too) and I know we truly are super close (especially for the short time we've known each other). I know we've drifted a little with you getting a boyfriend and I honestly I miss the girl you used to be...but I'm glad you're growing up. You'll be like my sister forever and I will spoil your future children rotton. :P I love you so much!

To the girl who buys and makes me random things out of the blue, thank you. The things you get me just hit home sometimes. It's not necessarily the things you get me, but just the fact that you care enough about me to buy me presents. You also will go out of your way to do things for me, text me almost every day, and hang out with me during the times that I really have no one to talk to. There are definitely times I do not know what I would do without you and I'm super glad you're in my life a lot more than you used to be. I love you!

To the quiet but super sweet girl in my life. Thank you for your confidence...for thinking the world of me, my family, and my voice. We connect in ways that I don't really connect with many other girls and that's really cool...like the fact that we both are kind of tomboys and like to playfully fight your older brother who is like twice our size. :P I love you girl. :) 

To the boy who lets me be a tomboy...and yet treats me nicely like a girl should be treated. I know that most the time we are playfully acting like we are going to kill each other, but there is always an underlying kindness we both have toward each other. Yeah, we playfully fight and tease each other a little bit, but when it comes down to serious conversations and the sad days, you know how to give me good advice and make me happy again. You mean a lot and I have a unique friendship with you...the dynamic is amazing and nothing like I've ever really had before. I'm super glad to have you as one of my best guyfriends.

To the girl who will listen to me to rant about like anything and is always there if I need to talk. You're seriously so sweet. Even though I can be a bit much for you when I'm extremely extroverted, you still love me and have even complimented my personality. You do little things that mean a lot too, like meeting one of my best friends when she came to visit and helping me set up for a party. You give me some pretty solid advice too. I love you girlie! :)

And last, but definitely not least, to the boy who makes me laugh when I'm stressed, warms up my hands when I'm cold, sits next to me and hangs out with me when I'm lonely, greets me with a smile, puts up with me picking on him, gets over-excited about things like I do, and never fails to treat me kindly. You're seriously such a great friend and I'm super blessed to have you in my life...I hope our friendship lasts a long time...

With Love,
Your Friend Sydney

My Crazy, Hectic Life...

Well, blogging can be fun but it can also be something that you feel tied down to--if I can call it that.

It's like this, over the past month, I've vowed to myself or other people to write blog posts about certain topics and ideas. Then eventually, I get to the point where I don't really want to...especially if it was an idea I 100% sold on blogging about...

...so, for now, I'm going to tell you about what's been going on in my life.

I'm 18 now, which means I'm "old enough to be free," in the words of my friend Andrew. :) However, freedom comes with a whole new boatload of responsibilities...like what you're going to do with the rest of your life, for instance. Yes, I have my ideas. Of course I have my dreams. Will it all come true? Well, who knows? What I really want...is for my life is to reflect the story that my Father in heaven is writing. He has my days planned out. All I can do is trust Him. Currently, I am still studying Digital Media Design at the local tech college. I have a couple scholarships and I'm using that money to finish up the coursework. Academically, I think I'm going to start going to university early next year and study business and marketing, but nothing is for sure yet.

I thought I would hang out with my friends quite a bit this summer...but I guess I didn't realize that my days were going to get full and QUICK. In May, my siblings, mom, and I drove to Missouri where I attended a young adult Bible conference over Memorial Day weekend. The rest of my family went down to a family Bible camp. 

We had a family vacation (2 weeks) at the end of June/beginning of July so we went to West Yellowstone, Yellowstone National Park, North Dakota to visit my great-aunt who turned 100 this year and to see some friends at a little church like ours up there, Medora, ND for a night, and then back home. 

When we got back, my aunt (not the same one from ND...this is one of my dad's sisters) came to visit for my homeschool high school graduation. We prepared for that. It was an amazing night spent with so many people I love that came out to support me. :)

The next day, we went to an awesome birthday party/fireworks at some of our friends' place. I got to hang out with a few of my friends I rarely ever see...and just had a great time in general.

Now, I'm really busy with another big event. During our time in North Dakota, one of our friends called and asked my sister and I to be in her wedding. That is coming up in just a few short days and so pretty much most of this month has been spent getting ready for that. I am excited to be a bridesmaid though!!!

After the wedding is done, there is a chance I may be able to go to a camp for teenagers/young adults up in North Dakota...

...and then in September we are going camping with friends...and then to California to visit family...

...oh yeah, and then once October comes around, a few of my friends from a different state are coming to visit me. 

Besides all that, somehow I still want to chill with my friends, get some things I need to get done finished, prepare for university, and continue to volunteer my time on Wednesday nights at AWANA (which starts in September). 

Guys...this is a crazy life...and it doesn't really slow down. My advice to you is to enjoy every moment, take nothing for granted, realize there's blessings in every phase of life, build your relationships with other people, and trust God with your future.

I think Stellar Kart might've put it best when they sang the words, "Life is good, eternal life is better." :)

An Unlikely Friendship...

I still remember when we were introduced to each other. Frankly, I’m sort of ashamed of what I thought of her at that time. Honestly, the person I imagined her to be was a worse and more worldly version of the girl I know and love today. 

Her name is Alexis and I met her at camp last summer. I actually had never been to a camp of any sort as a camper in my life. Well, actually there was that one time that I went for about two weeks to my close friends’ house for a “camp” experience type thing when I was twelve…but that doesn’t really count. Therefore, this was going to be my first time going as a camper. It was a family camp at a place called Covenant Heights in beautiful Estes Park, Colorado in August 2014. We arrived on a Sunday afternoon. I knew some of my closest friends (the same friends that I went to “camp” at their house/small farm) who live in Utah (where we live) were going to be arriving soon, and when they did, I greeted their daughter who had been at camp in Missouri and who I hadn’t seen in months and then kind of clung to them. We all had gotten there before most of the local people who were coming to camp, so we hung out together before everyone else started to show up. I guess my mom must’ve started talking to Alexis’ mom. I generally gravitate toward my mother when she’s making new friends, so either that’s why I went over to her or maybe it was because she called me…but either way, I remember standing next to her. Alexis came up at some point too and I think I recall her mother introducing her by name and age. I looked at her. She was wearing an Ironman shirt, jeans, and (if I remember correctly) either lots of bracelets or hair wraps. Her hair fell over her shoulders and she seemed sort of reserved at first. I honestly can’t exactly remember what I was wearing, but I would guess it was something like a T-shirt or casual-dressy blouse and shorts. My hair was probably up in either a bun or ponytail and I most likely had sunglasses on my head. From the outside, it didn’t seem like we’d really hit it off at all. So therefore, that evening at dinner (our first meal at camp), I sat with my Utah friends while Alexis went and ate with her friend Jordyn. This doesn’t mean that I didn’t glance back at her a couple times tho… 

I remember that at some point, my mom told my friends and I to reach out to Alexis because it didn’t seem like she had a lot of friends there…and I honestly don’t even remember how it happened…but it did. We ended up sitting together during some of the meetings and one night she asked if I wanted to come back to the lodge with her and hang out. We were staying in a trailer fairly far way from the center of the camp…so I checked with my mom and she said it was fine. Another day, Alexis told me that she and some other people from camp were going shopping in Estes Park and invited me to go along. I went and had a good time. A bunch of us went on a hike as a group, and that included Alexis and I. We hung out more in the lodge and at least some of the meals we sat together at a table. There were games of Octaball outside (whether sunshine or—pouring—rain). Hours were spent in the game room playing/watching others compete in carpetball, ping-pong, Polish, and pool. One evening, Jordyn, Alexis, Kristian (her brother—who I’m now also friends with), and I decided to play pool together in teams (2 on 2). So Kristian and Jordyn teamed up while Alexis and I formed the other team. Though we decided to play best of 5 and had to continue the tournament the next day and Jordyn dropped out, (I recall that) Kristian still beat us even though half the time he was shooting with the pool cue behind his back. :P WHAT IS THAT KRIS?? :) Yes, he's talented… One of the days I was playing around on the keyboard at camp (yes, I played it more than once…I like pianos, OK???), she came over and played a bit too and we chatted for a while. Anyway, even through all that, my sister seems to think that it wasn’t until the final day of camp that Alexis and I really clicked. It was a day of good-byes and I remember talking to her at length before we went our separate ways. I think our two families were some of the last to leave. We took several pictures (yes, including selfies) and hugged each other before we left. She went to her home that isn’t too far from camp and my family went on to meet my aunt and uncle at Bryce Canyon for a camping trip. During that next week in Southern Utah, I sent Alexis a message over Facebook and we chatted some. Our messages weren’t necessarily constant, but we did talk quite a bit over the next several months. They got deep though. Yes, I wear my heart on my sleeve…but I hadn’t really known her all that long and I was very upset about something so I messaged her all about it. She really appreciated that…and it was only the beginning. In the first months of 2015, we started to message each other almost 24/7. Around that time, we both became avid fans of Owl City and bonded over that. It also went deeper. There were pranks, deep topics, freak-out fangirl moments, and just random messages about thoughts that came into our minds or things that were going on in our lives. There was a night that we started talking about something and she got so upset that she started crying and I kept insisting that she call me over Skype…so she did and we probably talked until midnight. That wasn’t the first video call, either. We only do them once a month or so but they usually last several hours. There have been times that it’s gotten to be about midnight or later and my mom had to unplug the internet to break up our calls. Thankfully, she understood what happened and that I didn’t hang up on her. lol.  We recently were on a call that lasted between 2-4 hours and it was the last time we talked “face to face” before she left for camp. She’s been gone about 3 weeks now and has like 4 left. She really should come back because it kind of feels like a lonnnnnggggg time. I can’t message her all the time…which is a little strange since we’d start missing each other if we went a day or two…or even an hour or two sometimes without talking. Haha. 

When I met her, she seemed like a more nerdy girl who was kind of a tomboy. Her friend Jordyn seemed more girly-girl…and a lot more like me…but a bit more-so. I look at myself as sort of the kind of person that would be right in between them personality-wise. BUT…(happily) everything worked out.

Needless to say, she is now one of my best friends…in fact, I call her my “long-distance best friend.” It will be great to talk to her again after she gets back from camp, to Skype her, and to hopefully one day see her in person again! I love you Lexi! :) <3 

Celebrities!

We all love them...singers, rockstars, athletes, actors, etc. Admit it. You have a celebrity crush, right? We dream of meeting them. When they tweet us, we freak out. If they wrote us a letter, we'd keep it forever. We cherish their autograph. We listen to their music 24/7, watch their show every night, join fandoms and groups on the internet, share their pictures everywhere, talk about them all the time (drive our friends nuts), write blog posts about them, watch every game they play... Must I continue? 

The point of this post isn't to go on and on about the famous and popular people we love. In fact, I only said that to make a point. This morning I started thinking about God. I know what you're thinking at this point. Wait, we went fro actors, singers, and athletes to God? Where is this going? 

So all the kinds of people I mentioned above have a platform. They've done something to get to the place they're at. Think of God though. He's not a mere human...He's done so much! He created the earth and everything in it. That includes people...so what are their accomplishments? 

"What is man, that thou art mindful of him? and the son of man, that thou visitest him?" 
-Psalm 8:4 

To top it all of, Jesus paid for the sins of the whole world through His death on the cross so that we could have eternal life. If we're talking about celebrities, nobody could be more of one than God and Jesus are. Interesting thought, isn't it? 

So...the question--do we treat God like a celebrity? We may say we love Him, and perhaps we do. However, we don't act like it. Do we freak out about Him? God deserves the love we give to the famous people...and much more. We really should be cherishing His word as much as we fangirl (or fanboy...don't get mad at me) over a tweet or letter we get. We should want to spend time with Him praying and reading the Bible. I'm comparing it to a fandom...but honestly, He deserves so much more. I just don't understand how we can give so much of our attention, time, and energy to some imperfect human when God is the only one who truly deserves it. I'm not saying I have it all together because I don't. It's easier to freak out about what you can see and forget about what you can't...but I'm challenging all of us to reach out to God and give Him our love and admiration. :)

My Thoughts Lately...

Life has it's ups and downs...the good days and the bad days. But through it all, we must realize that we are blessed.

Like the other day. It was a bit rough and things didn't go the way I wanted them to. First off, my computer hasn't been working right. I lost my iPod months ago and don't get it back until the end of the month...and so I've been using my computer like crazy. I had been dragging it to school with me each day until one night the screen decided it didn't want to turn on anymore. I had already gotten the screen replaced, so you can probably imagine how frustrated and heartbroken I was that it wouldn't come on now. I honestly don't think that the screen is the problem, but rather something else that is blocking the power from going to the screen. Thankfully, the computer has been working with an external monitor attached and my mom and dad are going to get me an entry-level MacBook Pro for a combined birthday, high school, and tech college graduation (#grateful). I can't wait to order it, but my mom has been swamped with tons of stuff and so we haven't gotten to it yet. So yeah, I'm getting impatient and my life sure doesn't feel perfect at this point. I mean...I don't have my iPod (which makes life more complicated) and my computer is busted. I know I'm going to get a new computer, but it's not happening too fast and that bugs me. 

But everything got worse on Tuesday. I usually use Firefox as my primary browser and one of my favorite things is to watch YouTube videos on my computer. By that, I mean videos from the comedy channels I follow, random tips on how to tame my curly hair, earn money, etc., or perhaps my favorite, episodes of The Brady Bunch (yes, I love that old show). I noticed something wrong with my YouTube site on Firefox. My videos were in theater mode and didn't have option to make them the smaller, normal size. This sort of freaked me out so I started to research ways to fix it. But before I knew it, I'd somehow made it worse because when I'd click on a video, the audio would start playing but the video portion was only black. I tried uninstalling and re-installing Firefox but that didn't help either. I decided I'd have to use Chrome but still researched ways to fix my Firefox browser. But about then I got into a total frenzy about something and got really angry...and my mom took away the cord that connects my computer to the external monitor (the only thing that makes it really work). I was pretty heartbroken and went to the home computer and began researching ways to fix my computer again. However, I haven't backed up all the files I want to off my computer yet and things weren't working right where I was trying to get the bottom of the laptop off so that I could try to follow the YouTube tutorial I was watching. Besides, I'd probably make it worse so I put it back in the box and put the computer into a room that we usually use for storage. It was really an emotional moment for me...having the computer back in the box it was in when I got it in over 3 years ago. I began to have flashbacks about all that it used to be. I remember coming down that same hallway when I was 14 and being psyched! I reminisced about showing my grandma it and how we wrapped it up and I opened it on Christmas Day. I burst into tears...and couldn't really take it anymore. In this way, my world felt like it was falling apart...but what I didn't realize was how I could look at this as a blessing.

Let me explain... Right now, all I really want is to get my computer back (which I do tomorrow) and to order my new Mac. But once I have both of those things (and my iPod by the end of the month), there will still be something else I really, really want and won't feel complete without. I'm always going to be discontent. At the moment I can say that what I need is those three things and then I will be completely happy and my life will be perfect, but that's not true. It may seem that way right now, but, believe me, it won't. I'm sure I'll want something else and feel incomplete without it--like maybe a phone for example. YOUR LIFE ON THIS EARTH WILL NEVER BE PERFECT. However, if you look at it the right way, it's pretty darn good. While I kind of feel broken right now, I can choose to be content. I realize that I'm pretty blessed to be able to have a computer at all. Most people across the world would feel extremely privileged if they had the problems I deal with. We shouldn't take our life for granted because tomorrow everything could be taken away from us. We are pretty blessed, even on the days we don't feel like we are.

So basically, I want this blog post to accomplish three things. I desire for it to tell you three lessons I've learned from this experience: 

1. Your life on this earth will never be perfect and you'll never be completely happy all the time here.

2. Don't take the blessings you have right now for granted.

3. You may think things are bad right now, but they could always be worse.

And not to end this on a negative note, just remember that God has blessed us with so many things. We would be nothing without His love and grace. He makes the sun shine down on us every single day. He keeps us alive. There are many more blessings I could list that I experience in my own life, but I know the two I stated above everyone enjoys. :) But above and beyond all that, He gave us His Son who came to earth to be sacrificed for our sins so that we could live with Him in heaven for all eternity. We will be truly joyful and happy all the time there...and our lives will be perfect! :D